Saturday, February 10, 2007

Possible Land Buyers







I'm Tierd! I've spent the whole day working on http://www.AwakeningYourHealth.com I still feel good about it! Jakob played over a Dalens today and seemed to do pretty good. Leif had a great day at Coldwell Banker Advantage today. He had a couple come in who asked to look at a bunch of land. No less than 10 acres. That will be a Really good thing! We went down and played Dominos with Leif's mom tonight. That kindof one of our traditions. We used to do it nightly...

Tomorrow we have church at 9:00. So, we need to get to bed! Our house is a mess! I either need a dishwasher and a slightly bigger house with more storage; or, just more ACTION!
CRAZY!

~ Lena

Friday, February 09, 2007

Offered a job by the Multi-Million Dollar Man in town

It feels good to have this blog updated! Now I'll be able to write in it each day and not have to play catch up. Well, life just got brighter today! Leif called me this afternoon and he ended up being offered a job as a real estate project manager by the "Million Dollar Man" in town. This man owns several subdivisions in Kanab and is in the process of developing several for Fredonia. Leif has been doing what he can to show this man that he has what it takes to work for him. I thrilled to say that Leif's brown nosing worked! It's the Law of Attraction; or, the classic "Ask and ye shall recieve!" He will start in the Summer. Leif was just chatting with him today about a few ideas that he (Leif) has, and the man offered him a job. What a Blessing!

We are celebrating with ice cream and pumpkin chocolate chip cookies today. I'm glad to say the ice cream didn't end up being as good as I like. So... I won't eat as much. I've been walking every day. I love the girls that I walk with. But I sure wish that I could get over the weight platau that I'm on. I can't wait to start The Pampered Chef so I can earn some money! I really want to do the Colenix Cleanse. Then I want to buy Maca Root. And I want to start the Whole Foods Farmacy program as SOON as I can!!! I really think that will all help! The cleanse will make it so my body will absorb all of the nutrients, the Maca will balance all of my hormones and chemicals in my body, and the raw foods will retrain my system to be able to eat correctly and feel satisfied. And in the meantime, I'm sure I'll loose weight.

I'm still working on my website the site address will be http://www.AwakeningYourHealth.com I'm so excited to publish the site! I feel really good about the content of the site as well as the products that I feature. I hope everyone else enjoys it too!

Jakob is working on potty training himself. He is so awesome! I just have to remember that as long as I let things go at his pace and everything will work out right. As long as I'm in tune with his signals I am able to follow his lead. Now I just let him tell me when he feels like sitting on the toilet and I don't force it. Sometimes he goes, and sometimes he doesn't. Either way, I'm not training myself to tell him to go, he's training himself as he trys to tune in to his body. It's fun. No worries especially since he's only 2 1/2.

I just have to make a note, ice cream is TERRIBLE for us! That is so frustrating! I just ate a bowl full, and now I have a headache! UGG!

Well, I need to get back to working on my site...

Lena:)

Lena Found A Job

February 8, 2007

Hey There!:)

I just went to a party and found myself a job. I'm going to be a Pampered Chef Consultant. What do ya think? Personally, I think it would be Great for Nate too! They have stories about men on their site who have been very successful. Just thought I'd let you know.:)

Love Ya,
Lena:)

Family Update



February 6, 2007

Good Morning Family,

I decided to write since I know you're busy and sometimes I'm just not in the mood to call, or my phone is dead...

We all just had breakfast together and Leif's getting ready for work. He's working for the eye doctor again for the time being. As soon as we have other options; or we don't need to work there, he won't. He also works in the Real Estate office. ITV is still bringing in money and still seems to be bringing in more each check. So that's nice! He tested for the police job and he and the other guy he tested with were both a 50/50 chance. The only thing the other guy has that Leif wasn't a bit better at was his passion for police work. Otherwise, Leif was a bit better at everything. They'll present the results to the city council and we'll know by Valentines day. It's a hard thing though... we really don't know what to think or do about the job. The academy is in Phoenix and it is NASTY! I couldn't go... and the work environment isn't the best. But we are responsible, knowing that the medical benefits are unbeatable and the stability is very much needed! So, we pray, wait, and leave it up to the Lord... Leif just came out of the shower and told me that if they offer the job, we will take it! I'm with him on the decision. This also means that I will be traveling a lot during the 4 months he is gone. He will be home on the weekends, so I will try to be home then as much as possible. But from March 12-July 12th I will want to travel out to visit people and do things. We get paid while he's in the academy, so that will make it all possible. Let me know if you guys have any fun plans during that time-frame.

We've been exercising and eating really well, we're both on our way down on the scale. So that's really nice! As soon as we get money I want to do a whole foods program that has wonderful results! I've met with a doctor/naturalist and will be meeting with her regularly for a while. She has a very good head on her shoulders and her techniques work for me.

I've also been working on a compilation of natural healing herbs and supplements. It's been really neat! I'm creating a website so I can earn money selling some of the products. Speaking of which, Mom, Jason wants you to call him and talk about helping him get some Amoryn, the natural supplement to Paxil that I'm taking. It works for me. He's interested. Dad, please show mom the website, http://www.amoryn.com/

Jakob is doing well. He's fun as ever! Healthy, eating, getting more color as we're outside more, and working on being "a good friend" as he plays with all of the little kids in the neighborhood.

We're all doing pretty good. I'm doing good most of the time. There are just some moments still, where I look forward to being Great! But anyway...

I just wanted to let you know we're thinking about you. Hope all is well!

Love,
Us:)

Business Oportunity

November 21, 2006

Hey There,

I just wanted to write and tell you about a business opportunity that Leif has come into that I think you will be really interested in. I told Leif that I would only believe it was a good thing if we earned more money than we put into it within a short amount of time. We have earned over double what we put into it and Leif's been working only two months, and that is very part-time. He could only "work" while Jakob was napping and a little at night after Jakob went to bed.

The company is a multi-million dollar company called ITV Ventures. It was originally an infomercial company. They have now started a Network Marketing company. Right now the product line consists of health and nutrition products. They will be opening it up to several more products within the next little while. I think the best part of the company is that we as IBO's (Independent Business Owners) don't have to do "Cold" sales. Because the company is hooked up with infomercials, they send us the leads. We are able to finalize the sale for people who have already learned about the product and they have contacted us to buy the product. Once you finalize the sale the person will be your customer from that point on and you will always get the commission whenever they buy anything from that point on.

Being a network marketing company, of course there is the other opportunity where you can get a large commission for signing anyone up as an IBO. When it comes to this part of the business, we are in a very good spot. The network marketing part of the company is still in the beginning days. So when you sign up there aren't a million people above you. Leif is around # 400 in the company and has received spillover IBO's from IBO's above him. And then he gets a commision of the sales of those under him. This is one of the ways that people become Very wealthy from working in Network Marketing.

I know I don't do the best job of explaining the details. But I just wanted to send this out to you and let you know that I believe this is a very good opportunity. I am a VERY critical person of this kind of company. So I have made sure it's for real before letting you know.

If you Are interested in learning more about it, take 3 minutes and listen to a call at 1-800-720-6062 then contact Leif at http://us.f391.mail.yahoo.com/ym/Compose?To=leifbaron@yahoo.com, or call him at (435)689-0599.

Sisters Together Again


Rhea And LeOra's Story


All was well enough until my 20th week of pregnancy. That is when our lives changed forever. I had been growing increasingly bigger day by day (literally) for a couple of weeks. I then began to contract because I was so big. We were away from our doctor on a business trip (my husband got his real estate license) But we luckily had a routine appointment with our Maternal Fetal Medicine specialist
at week 20.

We walked into his office and turned on the ultrasound machine, and we immediately knew there was a problem; Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome. Our babies shared a placenta and the blood vessels were not formed properly. One baby was receiving too much blood, and the other was not receiving enough blood. The baby who had too much blood was producing way too much amniotic fluid (as a release) and the baby who didn’t have enough was not producing any fluid and she was stuck to her womb wall. I had no idea a baby could survive without amniotic fluid. But they can under certain circumstances. This time, action set in before shock could. This was a good thing!

We were on a flight to Seattle that night to see a TTTS specialist. There is a laser surgery they can do to the placenta to try and correct the blood flow. Unfortunately, by the time we got to the hospital in the morning it was too late for the surgery. I was dilating and going to deliver within a short time if we didn’t do something.

I was in the hospital for two weeks in Seattle on very strict bed rest. We did weekly amniotic fluid reductions and a cerclage to help my body maintain the ability to keep the babies. The babies were tested continually and I was finally stable enough to fly to another hospital closer to family.

Mind you, we live in a tiny town. This meant that my husband had to fly home and pack up our belongings and our son and move to where the specialist hospital was. Luckily, it was where my family lived and my brothers had an apartment for my husband and son to live in 5 miles from the hospital. We were very taken care of not only by people here on earth, but by those who are beyond our view.

I was in the hospital for six more weeks, still on strict bed rest. It was very hard. But as mothers, I think our instinct is to do what we have to do. All was pretty routine for the first five weeks; weekly amniotic fluid reductions (two litter’s worth on average), daily testing of the babies’ health, and managing to stop bouts of labor that would try to kick in to high gear.

All routine changed at week seven in the hospital and 26 for the babies. I was in the testing center chatting with all of the sweet nurses that had become my friends, when a mother’s worst nightmare came true. My little LeOra started to pass away. Her heart began to slow down and they rushed me to labor and delivery, we got the machine on in time to see her last heart beat. I watched my baby pass away. Only a mother who has been through that can really grasp the feeling and experience.

I was blessed to have a doctor who was able to administer to my spiritual needs as well as medical needs. This was a blessing. We prayed together. During this prayer I breathed a deep sigh of comfort. I knew all would be well. I did not say easy, I said well. My precious husband arrived soon after our baby passed and we shared our sorrow together.
Our Father in heaven was with us during this very poignant time. I know He knows us and is with us during these hard times. I understood something I hadn’t fully grasped before about our Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus Christ. Our Father let His son die for us. He knows how it feels to watch a child die…. He knows my aching heart.
I found hope at the thought that I still had little Rhea and she might still make it. We had to keep trying for her sake. So we did. I was in the same chair in the testing center five days later when we found that Rhea was retaining fluid around her skull and in her abdomen. This was not surprising. But it was what we were waiting for; a signal from her that it was time to deliver. (Mind you, by this time Rhea was swimming in amniotic fluid. A whole had been made so fluid from LeOra could flow to Rhea, Just a little side note.)

I was taken in for an emergency C-Section. My husband came with me and my wonderful Dr. rushed over from another hospital he was at to do the delivery. This meant a lot to me. The whole procedure felt like it took forever. When Rhea was born they rushed her to the NICU. After I was stable, my husband brought LeOra over to me so I could see her. She was beautiful. When you deliver a still born baby you don’t quite know what to expect. It was not an alarming experience. She was my baby and I could see her spirit. Physically, she was not scary. She was just a darker skin tone then what she normally would be. They brought her to us dressed in a cute little outfit and a beautiful pink blanket. It was a precious moment to hold her.

Rhea was in the NICU for eight days. We sat by her side every moment that we could. We talked with the doctors and just waited. We celebrated the good moments, took in her emanating love and spirit, enjoyed the presence of little LeOra that was close by as well as our grandmothers who had passed away. Rhea was named after my grandmother and LeOra was named after my husband’s grandmother.

We cried with Rhea as we knew that she was in pain. Her body was retaining fluid and her kidney’s would not kick in to cleanse her body. On day five we learned that she had severe brain damage. As a mother who had already watched one of her children die, I did not want to let Rhea go; no matter what! Until day number 8; Rhea was having tiny seizures and she had to be completely sedated. This is when we had a family prayer. My father in law led the prayer. We were told and comforted in the fact that our little Rhea’s time here on this earth was short. We knew that she had a mission to fulfill in heaven with her sister and we would be holding her back if we kept her any longer.

We decided that if we knew the answer there was no reason to prolong Rhea’s stay here on earth. We called our family together and the nurses helped us hold Rhea for the first time. We held her and loved her. After a while we allowed them to take the ventilator off and we continued to hold her. I carried her in to the room where everyone had gathered. As we walked in to the room I could sense that Rhea was unsure if I would be alright if she died. She was also physically struggling without the ventilator. It was all very subtle and not scary. But it was a tender moment. I held her close and whispered in her ear that all was well. I would be alright and she could go. She left her body shortly after that.

A couple of days before the family prayer that gave us our final answer of what we needed to do; Rhea had a doctor who could tell that she was far from healing. She hinted without telling us straight that it might be a good idea to take Rhea off of the machines. At this moment, I was not ready and I was completely confused emotionally and spiritually. I wanted to know why when we knew so clearly that Rhea was trying her best to fight and stay with us, was she not making it? Why did I have to let both of my babies die? It just wasn’t making sense; until the shift change for the Doctors. That night Rheas doctor was a kind man who we had never met. He just happened to unexpectedly get called in to that shift that night. No Coincidence.

He called us in to his office and it turned out that we had much in common spiritually and personally. It also turned out that he and his wife had lost a daughter before in a similar way. I told him my feelings, and I will never forget the part of his answer that hit home for me. He reminded me that our Father in Heaven who is all powerful and omnipotent is also obedient. He can work miracles and He does. But most of the time He has to follow the same laws that we follow; His Laws. There is a law of health. If the kidneys don’t work, the body will die. It is the circle of life. It is not a punishment or something to make us hurt, it is a law. Now, seeing that Father knows all things; my destiny as well as Rheas; if it was mandatory that Rhea stay on this earth at this time, than He would have made it so she could stay. But it wasn’t.

I believe that both of my little girls are companions in Heaven going about their Father’s business. And you know who their escorts are? Their great grandmothers; isn’t that beautiful?

Though I know with out a doubt I will see my babies again and I will have the chance to raise them after the resurrection. Even though I know that all is not lost, I still mourn. I still grieve, I still hurt… and that is okay!

November 8, 2006

Dear Friends and Family,

We have found so much strength from the many of you who have written to us and prayed for us. The spirits sustaining power has been with us these last several days. I wish that I had a more positive update. But that's not necessarily the case.

Baby Rhea's doctor called us in Monday evening to give us the results of a head ultrasound that was done that morning. Unfortunately the results clearly showed that Rhea had a severe brain hemorrhage in her brain as well as fluid that was pressuring the outside of her skull. As you can imagine the outcome results of this condition would most likely be severe handicaps.

Leif and I took this information and kind of set it aside because we could only choose one problem to focus on at a time and the Kidneys and bladder were our focus. But the next morning (Tuesday 7th) we went in to visit Rhea with Leif's parents who came into town and we could clearly sense that she was not well. Many times throughout the day we witnessed what were are suspecting were seizures.

The time came in the morning where Leif's dad gave Rhea a blessing. The spirit was strong and the Vail was thin. We knew we had many angels in our midst. As Mark gave the blessing, it became clear that it was Rhea's time for release from this life. It was a hard moment, yet it was so clear spiritually and physically, that we knew we had received the word from the Lord that gave us our answer and permission and it was our responsibility to act upon that. We waited until as many family members could be with us as possible, and then they let us hold her. We held her with the ventilator on for a while. Then we turned it off and held her until she was gone. Rhea's body fought long. We all got to hold her for a long time and feel of her sweet spirit. Leif and I marvel at the strength and comfort from the Lord that we received throughout the nights events. Rhea was at such peace. It was a beautiful feeling.

So, our little girls have gone back home and are serving our Father in Heaven along side their namesakes Grandma LeOra Baron and Rhea Westwood Stanger. I will not tell you that Leif and I are not missing them and mourning their loss. But I can tell you that there is no greater gift then knowing that we have a Father in Heaven who is very much aware of our lives and the journey that we are facing. We have learned that He has to follow the laws of physical nature just as we do. This is why He can't step in every time a beautiful child or loved one is dying. Yes, there are miracles. But most of the time the law is clear and everyone has to follow it.

We have all been blessed with a Savior who has made it a sure thing that all who die will live again. Leif and I will do all that we can to live worthy to raise our little girls after the Resurrection. This will be a precious goal and experience to work towards.

Thank you all for your Love and Support throughout this long journey. We will be forever grateful! We love you all!!

Leif, Lena, and Jakob Baron
October 27, 2008
As I was journeying through the loss of my twins, I found healing through writing. I have created a website with some of my thoughts about Baby Loss. On this website you will find a few thoughts from me during poignant times along the path to healing as well as articles I wrote titled: Please email me if you are interested in these articles. I am currently trying to make their PDF available. For now email me at MammaBaron at Yahoo Dot Com

SHOULD WE SEE THE BABY OR NOT?


WHAT MIGHT THE BABY LOOK LIKE?


SHOULD WE BURY THE BABY OR NOT?


HOW DO I STOP MY MILK FLOW?


WHAT DOES A BABY LOOK LIKE AFTER THEY DIE?


AS A NURSE, DOCTOR, OR HOSPITAL EMPLOYEE, WHAT IS MY ROLL?

October 27, 2008
This is a link to the first posts on this blog. They are written by me while I was in the hospital with the girls. September-October 2006

Much has happened



November 4, 2006

Well Hello Everyone!

I am finally out of the hospital, and I don't have a gigantic belly blocking my way to the computer. A lot has happened since we last wrote. Five days after we lost LeOra I was in having our regular ultrasounds for Rhea our surviving baby. As we proceeded through that we all noticed (we got really good at deciphering ultrasounds) that the baby had fluid around her skull and in her abdomen. After the Doctor looked I was in the preparation room for an emergency C-Section within a half hour. The delivery took over an hour and I will admit that it was a HORRIBLE experience to be numbed past my lungs. It was hard to breath. But I survived and so did Rhea. LeOra came out first at 1 pound 13 ounces and Rhea came out at 2 pounds 6 ounces 14 inches long..

After the surgery was over Leif brought LeOra to me to see. She truly was beautiful. She just looked like she was sleeping peacefully. At that point her skin was still pinkish and it was a good experience to see her for the first time. After I was out in the recovery room and not quite as sedated, they brought LeOra in for Leif and I to hold. We were humbled to see the love and tenderness that the hospital rendered us. They brought her to us dressed in a pretty pink outfit with a beautiful knitted hat, wrapped in a gorgeous knitted pink blanket. It was a very special experience for us to hold her. Tears were shed. But we still felt the comfort of the spirit. They let us see LeOra any time we wanted for the next day and a half. This made it possible for both sets of grandparents to have the opportunity to hold her. She will be buried in the same plot as her name sake Grandma LeOra on Wednesday.

Rhea is our precious little one who has unselfishly made the choice to stay with us so far. The first night that we saw her she looked little and pink and seemed to be hangin' in there. But as time has gone on her little body has had to put up a fight. At this point the majority of her vital organs are at least stable. But her Kidney's and bladder have never functioned. She is going on day 6 almost 7 days of life. Her abdomen and her head/face are very swollen with fluid and she seemed to be in noticeable pain for the first time today. They have given her mass amounts of diuretic medications to try and get her renal system to jump start.

Rhea was given a blessing her second night of life. At that point Father in Heaven gave her the choice whether to stay here with us, or go back and serve with her sister in Heaven. It was hard for us to hear those words when you want so badly to just say "BE HEALED!" and have everything all better. We could feel that the Vail was very thin between here and heaven for the next couple of days as Rhea made her decision. In the mean time she was given another blessing and this one again turned out to be a blessing of comfort (As the men have No idea what they will be saying until it is said) Leif and I hit our sorrow point for her when we came in one morning a few days ago and her abdomen had turned purple like a bruise. We cried many tears that day and night and pled with our father in heaven throughout the night.

By the next morning Leif and I felt renewed faith from our experience of pleading with the Lord. We went in to visit Rhea and we felt her spirit letting us know she was staying. That day we were happy when the doctors told us that other than the kidneys and bladder her body was stabilizing. She had a really good day yesterday.

This morning we went in and Rhea seemed to be in pain and they were upping her pain and sedation medication. Leif and I still feel peace for her future. But we need the tides to turn. Leif felt that it was appropriate to give Rhea another blessing. This was another very special blessing. Rheas body was commanded to begin the healing process and allow Rhea the chance to honor her decision to stay on this earth. Needless to say Leif and I were given much peace from this blessing. As of this evening Rhea was stable and the doctor had decided to up her meds to help her kidneys. She did this because there have been three diapers that MIGHT have had urine on them and she wants to give her all the help she can.

We are in good spirits. It is VERY hard to be patient. But there is more to this then we can see and we have to leave everything up to the Lord. He is the master physician. We truly believe that!

We love you all and thank you SO Very much for all of your love, support and prayers. Thank You! We hope all of you are well!

Love Lena and Leif

Events out of our control

October 26, 2006

Well, there are times in life when there just aren't a lot you can say about certain things that happen. Many of you have been walking with us through this journey that we are on. Because of your love and concern, we feel the need to share with you the events of yesterday afternoon.

I woke up and all was well. I went to the testing center around 1:00 for our regular 1 hour fetal monitoring. As we began, all seemed normal and well. Both babies were moving and nothing seemed to be out of the ordinary. Within a matter of minutes one of the babies went from moving around to loosing her heart rate. It was a flurry of controled panic. The doctors tried to rush me into labor and delivery. But in a matter of 15 minutes and seconds of arriving into Labor and delivery her heart had stopped.

We were in shock. We have a wonderful doctor who came with a couple other doctors and gave me a beautiful blessing that calmed me very much. It has been and will continue to be a long wearysome jouney. As of now, I have not delivered either baby and we won't until it becomes apparent that we need to. When that is? I have No idea.

It has been hard, but we feel comforted. We are truly grateful for the understanding that we will be able to raise her one day after the ressurection. Her name is Leora Lynn Talithacumi. She has had her name for months and we know now why we were prompted to name her this. Talithacumi comes from the bible, Christ said this as he raised a girl from the dead. It means, "Damsel, I say unto the arise." Someday...

I'm weary...but surviving. I hope this finds you all well. We wish this was a happier update.

Love, Lena and Leif
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